Crazy Drummer Boy

Big ups to Moniker for finding this little gem:



I'm telling you, if I could put as much energy into practicing law as this guy does as a drummer, I could cure cancer (or something like that). Let's break down the drummer’s styles (in order):

Fairly calm – twirling sticks

Throws sticks, gets a little crazy

Brings it down a notch

Does the windshield wiper

Does the Robot

Time to bring back the flurry

Pete Townsend windmill action

Around the world (head)

Bat-shit crazy

It is especially funny given that he’s playing with a couple of guys who appear to need their pulses checked. Also, does this band really need an emcee?

Answers to Movie Quote-apalooza II

The Bald Hippie knows how to use Google, ladies and gents. What's really sad is you still missed one. I'm retiring the movie quotes for a bit, didn't seem to take off. Here are the answers:

1. Weird Science - the beautiful Kelly LeBrock (pre-Steven Seagal meltdown)
2. Fletch
3. Roadhouse - Sam Elliot is the most awesome guy alive
4. A Fish Called Wanda
5. They Live - Spoken by Rowdy Roddy Piper - See below
6. Spaceballs - Mel Brooks send up of Star Wars
7. Back to School - Rodney Dangerfield
8. Zombieland
9. Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade
10. Talladega Nights: The Legend of Ricky Bobby



Quick explanation: The sunglasses allow Piper to see the aliens hiding among us, the gun, obviously, helps him kick alien butt, and the mullet lets him look fabulous doing so.

BoDerickus' BNOW

It's Friday, it must be time for another exciting installment of the Bad Name of the Week:

Alias Humphreys - Gamer at EA Games - When Alias checks in at a hotel, he uses the name Joe.

Urhines Kendall Icy Eight Special K Smith - Topeka, Kansas boy born to Evelyn and Kendall Smith way back in 2003 - Seriously, what the heck kind of name is Kendall for a boy?  Who else wants to bet that Urhines is pronounced yourhighness?

Jetson G. Hollingsworth - Attorney for Butler Snow - The G. stands for George - Jetson's parents were big Hanna-Barbera fans.

Ayatollah William Wallace - Convicted of kidnapping - In court he stood up and yelled: "they may take our lives, but they'll never take... OUR FREEDOM!"

See what I did there? You thought the easy joke is about Ayatollah, but instead, BoDerickus makes an obscure reference to a movie about a Scottish revolutionary. BoDerickus is uncompromising in his dedication to the BNOW.

Movie Quote-apalooza II

How about another round of guess that movie quote?  All of these movies are definitely in my favorites, which tells you all you need to know about me. I'll even throw a couple of hints your way (not that they will be very helpful). Make sure you throw in your answers in the comments section, and, again, please don't use anonymous for your tag, be creative.  Winner gets to have bragging rights as the second best movie genius on this website.  Here we go:

1. You know, there's going to be sex, drugs, rock-n-roll... chips, dips, chains, whips... You know, your basic high school orgy type of thing. I mean, uh, I'm not talking candlewax on the nipples, or witchcraft or anything like that, no, no, no. Just a couple of hundred kids running around in their underwear, acting like complete animals.

2. Can I borrow your towel for a sec? My car just hit a water buffalo.

3. This place has a sign hangin' over the urinal that says, "Don't eat the big white mint."
*If BoDerickus had three hands, he would give this movie three thumbs up.

4. Now let me correct you on a couple of things, OK? Aristotle was not Belgian. The central message of Buddhism is not "Every man for himself." And the London Underground is not a political movement. Those are all mistakes. I looked them up.

 5. I have come here to chew bubblegum and kick ass ...and I'm all out of bubblegum.
*Without a doubt, one of the most entertainingly cheesy movies of the 80s starring one of the most entertaining wrestlers of the 80s.  Bonus points if you can name the "actor".

6. So, Lone Star, now you see that evil will always triumph because good is dumb.
*An underrated spoof movie from the 80s.

7. Are you fat? When you go jogging, do you leave potholes? When you make love, do you have to give directions? At the zoo, do the elephants throw you peanuts? Do you look at a menu and say OK!?
*This movie just doesn't get any respect.

8. There's a box of Twinkies in that grocery store.  Not just any box of Twinkies, the last box of Twinkies that anyone will enjoy in the whole universe. Believe it or not, Twinkies have an expiration date. Someday very soon, life's little Twinkie gauge is gonna go  . . empty.  Time to nut up or shut up!
*Great movie from last year. 

9. Brody's got friends in every town and village from here to the Sudan, he speaks a dozen languages, knows every local custom, he'll blend in, disappear, you'll never see him again. With any luck, he's got the grail already.
Cut to Brody: "Uhhh, does anyone here speak English? Or even ancient Greek? Water? No thank you, sir . . . fish make love in it.
*Movie number 3 in a 4 part collection; my favorite movie ever and one of the best action movies of all time. Also, it doesn't get any better than that last line.

10. Hell yes I am! They are winners! That is how winners talk! If we wanted two wussies, we would have named them Dr. Quinn and Medicine Woman!

Dr. Cleophus' Quickie Movie Review

Today's installment: INCEPTION

In haiku format:

Trippy and intense.
Leo's gaze always somber.
End. What just happened?

BoDerickus' BNOW

Here we are folks, back for another exciting week of scanning the globe for the best names in existence. Let's get started, shall we?

Fairly Vanover - TN Court of Appeals - The name's Fairly. Fairly Vanover. Excuse me, do you know you're first name is an adverb?

Uranius Johnson - WR at Marshall - Heh, heh . .  heh, heh . . . he said urnaius. 

Uranius is the name of a Roman usurper cited by Zosimus. Somebody's mom really liked their Roman history.

I object, your Honor, the mummy
is leading the witness

Imhotep Alkebu-lan - Attorney in Jackson, MS - Imhotep was the high priest of Ra circa 2675 BC. It looks like Imhotep has come back as a criminal defense attorney in Jackson.

 

 

 

As an aside, my favorite hotep, you ask?

Thank ya! Thank ya very much!

Dr. Cleophus' Quickie Movie Review

Today, a movie that I have been eagerly awaiting for months.  This movie is a big old block of jalapeno cheese dipped in Velveeta and then fried a golden brown. I'm talking about:

                                                                    MACHETE

Throw in Cheech and Lindsay Lohan and you have the greatest cast ever assembled!

Babes, blood and big ol' blades.  Not enough? How about bare boobies, bad guys and beheadings? Still not enough to get you in?  Okay: Bambitas, Banditos, bazookas and balls out action.  You know Machete is the guy who will get it done for you; he's a real MexiCAN.  

**The following will only to be understood by a handful of people**
I was met by the media on the way out and asked how I liked the movie. My answer (for some reason in an old Jewish woman's voice): I  LOVED  IT!!!  I'm going to see it . . . . . . .  TWICE MORE!

Who Knew -Ninjas Are Pansies

I have so many questions / comments about this video:
1.  Why is the guy driving a car that looks like it belongs on the "It's a Small World" ride at Disneyworld?
2.  Never complain about American TV.
3.  Skates?  Really?
4.  Is the economy so bad that one of the Ninjas had to borrow his mom's minivan to carpool in?
5.  Was that the deadly Ninja arm whip that I see executed to perfection?
6.  That car is so small and unstable, the Ninjas could have easily ninja'd the car over on its side.
7.  I mean,skates? Really? Nothing says stealthy like rollin' on 8 wheels.
8.  Who were these ninjas' masters, the Bay City Rollers?
9.  Moral of the story - If you ever need to get away from Ninjas, you better hope they are wearing skates and you can find a hill.

Slow News Day

Check out the "Quick Vote" section on the right in this screencap from the CNN website:

Thanks to the Bald Hippie for this.

CNN is finally getting its finger on the pulse of America with this question.

Some of you may say: "Is this is news?" To you I say, are you kidding me? Of course this is news!

And CNN, the answer is a resounding "Yes." We should fear those scaly bastards (and the green ones, and the furry ones and the ones who look like a bloated Vinnie Barbarino with dreadlocks). But not the ones with long fingers that like Reeses Pieces. They just want to go home. I’m wearing my tin foil hat as I type this.

Hotty Toddy??? Ah, Hell!

Awesome day, until . . .

It was a beautiful day for football, one of the best opening days in the past 10 years. Sunny, high of 83, the Grove was warm and inviting, Masoli was cleared to go, and the Rebels were enjoying a first half whipping up on a cupcake Div.I-AA team.
And then . . .

Actual looks on the faces of the people in my section.

As the crowd looks on in utter disgust; the bottom drops out and the rug is pulled from under the Rebels.

If you would have told me yesterday that the Rebels would lose to Jacksonville State, I would not have believed you any more than I would if you told me Jacksonville State hails from Alabama rather than Florida.  Wait, what?  Really? There's a Jacksonville, Alabama?  Great, now Ole Miss will lose 3 games this year to teams from Alabama.

If there's one thing I learned from 70's radio, it's this:
1. You don't pull on Superman's cape.
2. You don't spit into the wind.
3. You don't coast after you get a decent lead and then let J-State get momentum heading into the 4th quarter.
4. You don't mess around with Jim (or Slim).
That Jim Croce was an eerie prognosticator.